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However, you are at risk of making your partner think true space could only be achieved by ending the relationship.

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It’s especially common when the partner who wanted space starts to think about returning that the other, who has been holding onto hope for the relationship, starts to get cold feet.

I blame myself for asking all those questions about the affair because I worry it has led to the separation.

I spend my time going over and over things in my head and one minute I think things are turning around but the next minute I’m questioning what my wife is doing with her time alone and whether or not we’re really ‘working on the marriage’.

As a therapist, this is a good sign because he or she is ready to negotiate for what he or she needs – rather than accepting anything to get his or her partner back – but for the couple it can be really unsettling. If you’re reached a dead end, how can you go back and find another way round? ”, it is not only exasperating but you’re reminding them that they don’t love you or need space.

Key idea for saving your relationship: Setbacks and painful but they are not a problem if you can learn something from them. So I know it’s hard but please wait for them to talk about the future, your job is to make today’s interactions better.